This indecisions bugging me ….
At the beginning of the school year, we discussed with Becca if she would like to stay at school to eat lunch with her friends or if she wanted to come home at lunch.
Honestly I had hoped she was going to want to be with me forever and … But alas she opted to stay at school. However this is the first year that the school has been open to all students staying for lunch (previously one had to pay to be part of the lunch program that was run by a third party). This year the department of education mandated that all schools provide the opportunity to stay at school for lunch to all students for free.
Yet the department of education did not provide extra funds for this. So now there are 300 students staying and 8 lunch monitors supervising them. Needless to say it is a tad chaotic and will only get worse as the weather worsens, preventing the hoodlums children from going outside.
Granted my child is not hoodlum material. I am told she eats her lunch and them plays with her friends in a totally acceptable manner. So really it isn’t bad for her to stay.
I miss her. I would love to have her here half way through the day to talk, bond, argue and annoy us. Yet then Ethan would not have his time to nap, and Cordi would be interrupted all the time. It is a tough balance between the three. Plus Ethan would have to walk to the school and home 4 times a day.
I am so torn. Becca keeps changing her mind.
What are your thoughts?
Do you adore having Clash stuck in your head now all day?
Should I stay or should I go now?
Should I stay or should I go now?
If I go there will be trouble
An if I stay it will be double
So come on and let me know
A Canadian mom with three cute kids. This blog chronicles our lives my creative pursuits. 
I can so see and feel your dilemma! Here in NZ they have to stay and we have to send lunch with them! I would love a catch up half-way through the day, but it would be probably quite disruptive for Theo and i and also for Olivia.
Are you able to do it for a couple of days a week? That would work for me
Even one special lunch date!
That song will stick!
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I say let her stay.
It’s just easier with 3, to have that bit of extra time.
I mean, of course she is missed, but…
okay… maybe it’s just me.
L2 stays for lunch after school.
for us, it would just be too hard for nate to come home for lunch every day. LA has 1/2 days on weds in the elementary grads. so every weds they get out at noon. willow will take a nap as early as 11 (if i let her or we are in the car). but her drop-dead nap time is 1 pm. it would totally hose any nap she takes to have nate come home at lunch time. on weds, i can get her to hold out until after we pick him up, but quite often she actually falls asleep on the way to school.
one thing we in LA lack is a hot lunch program. you heard me right. until parents got involved and arranged for various restaurants around town to bring in a hot lunch for cheap there wasn’t one offered. and even what we have now, is not offered every day of the week. (something about “we make too much money, so the state won’t subsidize it.” nice huh? as if there is no one in LA cty living below the poverty level.) one thing we do have is a PTA that arranges for lunch time monitors from a pool of parental volunteers. which might be an idea for becca’s school. parent volunteers. adult eyes are adult eyes, right?
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That is totally different than when I was in school. We had to stay on the school campus and either pay for school lunch or take a sack lunch from home. Even if we lived near the school we were still supposed to stay.
Good luck figuring it out though. I hope that you can find a solution soon so you won’t have to think about it anymore.
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Tough call. I’d opt for stay, you will likely appreciate it greatly this winter.
Kamryn stays for lunch, we live ridiculously close and it is crazy but I found as she started full time it was harder to set up play dates so I found this gives her an extra 30 minutes a day to play with her friends. It is pretty cheap I think at $16 a month and a small tax write off for us, there are approximately 200 kids that stay and luckily Kamryn also falls into the non-hoodlum category.
I love having Max come home but I also see there is a part of him that gets upset when he comes home because at school he has constant attention. I also thinks he has friends and a schedule. I think it is up to becca and wold they let you try it out for a week and see how it goes? I was just going to ask if I could see if Max could just stay for lunch and then pick him up after but I also need to make sure that sam would be on the schedule to pick him up and not be asleep. But as for becca-i think she enjoys being with her friends.
We have no choice to the aspect. If we lived closer I could go pick him up & walk back after lunch but since he’s bussed to school, he takes his lunch with him & eats there. Now here, they eat lunch in their classrooms. They have a few students from higher grades come & watch them as they eat, but there is always a teacher/assistant floating around too.
So far we haven’t had any issues with this. All last year worked ok & so far so good this year as well.
Sounds like for you it actually is better that she chose to stay at school. Think of it also when the snow comes & it’s bitter cold, you will be glad you don’t have to bundle the other 2 kids 4x a day, lol
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With working my kids have no choice (at this time). When I am on mat leave M will come home at 11am (on the bus). We only have half day JK/SK in our board. D is in grade 3 and he will continue to eat at school. I would have to drive to go get him and bring him back since we are a 15 minute walk from school. Plus he rather stay there and hang with his friends. The principle recently mentioned that of a population of 700 kids at our school, only 1 family gets their children to eat lunch at home.
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I’m pretty sure there’s no option here, so it’s kind of nice they give you a choice (but what do I know?). I’m wondering if you can choose by semester? Let her stay when she can get outside with her friend’s and play and have her home when it’s winter and likely to be crazier and inside? Although, that’s also when it would be yuckier for you to walk and pick her up.
It’s tough that she keeps changing her mind. Is J ever home when she’s at school so you could (not announced, not making a deal) take a look at lunch and see what’s what, put your mind to rest I’m sure?
Good luck.
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I, too, say let her stay. It’ll be a great opportunity to get out and have a little bit more playtime while the younger ones at home enjoy their nap/quiet times. She’ll be able to tell you all about it when she comes home and I’m sure she’ll have a blast.
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Our students can stay for $2/day (and bring their own lunch) or go home. This year I only have ONE child who goes home – I used to only have a few who stayed. The world is a-changin’!
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Heh! Sometimes I have a song stuck in my head for weeks. So tiring.
I am not used to the cold weather, but if it were me I would vote to let her stay at school for lunch so she (and you and the younger kids) don’t have to trek out in the cold.
Hope you are doing great!
Holly at Tropic of Mom´s last blog ..Pines
I say let her be indecisive….at least a couple times a week. It won’t be too long before you won’t be able to pay her to skip out on her friends and eat lunch at home.
Your kiddos look more adorable every day!
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Here, we don’t have a choice. Lunch is just lunch. The kids aren’t even allowed to leave, but the parents can take lunch from somewhere to eat with them. I would also think it would just more of a … hassle, for lack of a better word, to have to go and back and forth twice a day, and with a new baby, and the weather getting colder, you certainly don’t need any more chances of any of your kids getting sick, right?
It’s sort of her job as the eldest child to be ready to be more grown up than you are for her to be (how’s that for a weird sentence construction?). In short, she will tug you to the next level of separation, which is totally normal and healthy and, as a result, gives you more for the other kids. It’s not that she’s any less yours; it’s that she’s ready to take on more of the world.
But if she wants to come home: Cool!
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oh that does seem like a lot to have to get the kids back and forth for school and lunch in between…hmm…I would encourage her to stay for lunch, but that’s just me!
Good luck figuring this out!
Michelle´s last blog ..What Do You See?
Right now I go down from work to visit my two at lunch, and I would be very sad if I didn’t have that little time with them. But if it was interrupting naptime? I’d probably stop.
I’m just glad to hear that you guys walk. I never see kids walking to the school near my parents’ place, just line-ups of cars.
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We have G in the lunch program. Where he was already doing it down south (they have to there) and where I am looking for work, we did not want any more changed than what was needed. The ratio is a little weird though! Now the school board here is supposed to have strict rules that it has to be -20 to NOT go out…and most usually stick to it! We are beyond happy with G’s school!!!
I LOVE The Clash, and would much rather have them in my head all day than any number of other possibilities
I know you want her home, but unless there were problems at school, I’d probably encourage her to stay there. I’d encourage her to come home if it didn’t interfere with the other childrens’ schedules, but it’s probably best to stick with the plan whenever possible.
Yay for the potty training! Consistency is key. But you knew that already.
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Oh, this is a tough one. It’s hard when they start having choices, isn’t it? I like Gail’s idea (1st one). Can you choose 1 day to pick her up & bring her home for lunch? Maybe Fridays could be your special day to eat together. If not, I guess I would try having her stay at school, if she’s enjoying it, for a few more months. Maybe you could join her there every now and then. Good luck!