Foggy Spacey Ugh!
Pic of the Day ~ Becca on our Hike
My brain is just not functioning properly today. Becca & I were to join the Mom’s group for a Nature Hike. It was only suppose to be 43 minutes away, however that is only the case IF you take the correct freeway!! As I see Palm Springs on the horizon, my brain finally makes the connection that maybe, I am going the wrong way. UGH! So I turn around and head back (all the way back) and get onto the right freeway *sigh* Two hours later we arrive, only to discover I did not pack any diapers. I have had this kid kicking around now for over an year and a half, one would think I would remember that she needs diapers. Thankfully, most mothers understand Diaper Karma, and one wonderful mom rescued Becca & I from leakiness and ultimate doom. To top off the morning, I go into the port-a-potty (yeah yuck) to discover that my day is just getting better & better, the freaking witch arrived 6 days early, leaving me unprepared.As Becca & I walked along the path, I never felt so alone in my life. Here we were, blessed to have a great group of women and kids to hang out with and I just want to cry. Not wanting to be “the crazy one” in the group, I swallow back my tears and kept hiking. It is not like one really wants to have a mental breakdown with a toddler in tow, with a group of women you barely know, in the middle of, somewhere. Being the girl that is from another country, that will be returning to that country at some point, is not the greatest opening to a friendship. It is hard to develop that bond with someone you know is going to leave, I totally understand that, it is hard for me too. However, that leaves me with no one to talk to, share my fears with, my pain, and my mental breakdowns. The relationships that are made are usually that of the superficial kind, not the ones you want to pour your heart out to. This is where my blog comes in. You get to read about all my craziness, you are my support, my shoulder to cry on. Yet I hold back sometimes, not wanting to worry anyone and afraid that I will come out sounding like a future mental patient. I so hate this time of month! My hormones are all whacked out, I am an emotional train wreck and my head hurts like hell.
All that being spewed out…Becca & I had a wonderful time (despite my spacey head) on the hike. Becca really enjoys watching the kids and is starting to run around with them a little more. As I have mentioned, most of the kids are older than Becca, but she loves the company. The drive home seemed quick (I did not get lost so that helped). We watched a little Dora and played with some playdough.
I cannot wait for this day to end. I need a hot bath and a good nights sleep. Hmm maybe a little rum & diet pepsi too…
ps..thank you for all your kind words about the theme, you guys are so swell!
{{HUGS}}
I am your friend.
Light some candles, pour yourself a drink, and take a nice hot bath with your ipod. Cause tomorrow will be better. And if it isn’t rinse and repeat. And blog again another day.
Hey Chelle:
I can TOTALLY relate to the “not having someone there when you need to have a breakdown” feeling. Hang in there. . .and remember, you have soooo many people who care about you (as evidenced by all the responses to your blogs!) who are just a click (or call) away, and two people who love you more than the world living in the same house as you!!! Take care and I hope you have a better day tomorrow
Andrea
I have done similiar where it took me about 40 mins off track
if you were in my city I would be your friend even if you were leaving. Ironically most ofmy friends are of this variety - they move to my city temporarily - we become good friends - thenthey have to move, it makes for cool places to visit, and my kid knows people everywhre so when you turn comes here know thatI am here for ya!
Oh hormones…I swear they make everything 100% worse. I am sorry that you were so sad, but I am glad that your blog holds as a cheap form of therapy (I feel the same).
Today is a new day
Yikes! That sucks!
Remember all of your friends at home who still care even if they never see you…
Hope today goes much better, and I’m so glad Becca is loving the playdough!
Oh, I’m sorry you had a bad day, but glad that you could enjoy yourself after the diapers, your friend, etc.
Becca looks like she’s having a grand old time as usual!!
Hang in there…every day is a new day.
Chelle, I can totally relate. I’ve had that experience of feeling so incredibly alone in this large group of people who you don’t really know and on the one hand you want to talk to them but on the other you know they dont’ REALLY care and that they’ll just end up thinking you’re a freak. Ugh. So been there. Future mental patient? Hola, that’s me too, mama.
aww…. hugs
I’m here for you
I am sorry you fealt alone.
I know what that is like and have felt it many times since we moved. I would be your friend even if you were leaving. I am sure some great gals out there would feel the same way. If not, they suck anyway!
It must be the name and the way it’s spelled because my “witch” came early too. In fact, it came twice this month, WTH!
Anyway, I hope you get that hot bath, diet pepsi, and rest you need tonight. For me, it was Pepsi. I am so going to regret it in a few hours!