It was one of those days that the camera just did not come out so I thought I would post a classic pic for you all!

It rained last night. A beautiful storm. Everytime it rains I think back to the night that Becca was born. It stormed that night & I gazed out my hospital window, deep with desire to be with my daughter. She felt so far away, sleeping in the NICU & I felt so alone & scared. Was she ok? Did she long for me like I longed for her? When will I be able to hold her in my arms, nurse her, kiss her….
They say that memories fade over time, but this memory of that night seems so strong still.

My mind was totally on babies as I drifted in and out of sleep last night. I had a crazy (and recurring) dream that I was giving birth to twins! My water broke and Becca was calling J on a cell phone. We rushed to the hospital, where I amazingly gave birth to twin boys (very quickly lol dreams are so great that way!). Becca remained in the room, because we had no where to take her. It was a wild dream. As exciting as twinds would be, I really hope that was not a glimpse into the future It is not the first time I dreamt of having twins. When I was pregnant with Becca, I dreamt constantly that I was having twins. My OB said that women rarely dream of their current pregnancy and that I was probably dreaming of my second pregnancy :O My dad was a twin (sadly, his twin died in infancy), so it totally runs in our family. Craziness

Becca & I walked J to work again this afternoon (thankfully no rain this time!). We cruised over to the park afterwards. Becca is totally not a fan of crawling in the great outdoors. When we sit her on the grass, she sticks her feet up in the air, so not to touch it! It is really cute to be honest! Anyhoo! I placed Becca on the sand at the park to see if she would crawl to the equipment. After much encouragement she did indeed crawl on the sand!! It was so cute to watch her. I have been reading about free play and the importance of allowing your toddler decide where and how she plays, so I wanted her to decide what she wanted to do at the park, rahter than me guiding her.

*sigh* Once again Becca was totally relaxed and sleepy when nursing tonight, then BAM! Wide awake and totally not going to sleep!!! grrr! She lies in our arms totally relaxed and content but refuses to allow herself to go to sleep. Nothing in her routine has changed…..Well except the fact that I have been disappearing 5 days a week to go to work or sleep once home from work. But she is totally cool about napping during the day. In fact she is improving, falling asleep almost instantly and not nursing during the day. *sigh* I spent an hour in her room trying to get her to sleep, then J tag teamed and took over. She finally fell asleep after he wrapped her up tight in a blanket and racked her to sleep. She was soaked with sweat but asleep. Changes are just going to get worse before it gets better. In four short weeks I am done work, and then one week later we cruise off on our trek across the US to California in a UHAUL!?!?! Poor kid, we are about to rock her world completely! Fun Fun Fun

hehe, we are suppose to have a staff meeting next week. I spoke to my boss, letting her know I could not attend because J had to work. Rather than saying that was cool, I am to bring Becca to our staff meeting. Really she can’t breach confidentiality soooooo….It should be interesting!

I off to read a few great blogs then hit the sack. I am heading into work early tomorrow so I can get off earlier, and therefore be able to take Becca to our weekly playdate!! weee!!!

Technorati Tags: No Tags |
Filed under Becca, Work