Sorry everyone, no pic of the day today After sleeping most of the day away, I spent the rest fretting about finding an apartment in California.

We found a few place that do not accept pets, which got me all in a frenzy. Becca loves that stupid cat. Grrrrr….Honestly I love that crazy feline too! The thought of giving him up drives me crazy with grief. But the drive to take care of my family is primal!

We may have found an apartemnt that accepts cats (ok everyone cross your fingers and toes). I hope to apply and get it all secured this week. It is an odd feeling paying for a home we have never seen except for pictures on the internet. But much worse would be arriving in sunny California with no home to go to.

Ok a really odd phenomenon occurs in CA. The apartments usually come with a fridge. This is totally foriegn to me. Like wha? No fridge??? Weirdness!! So we either have to rent or buy a fridge…..*shakes her head in disbelief* In Canada we always get a fridge with rental property, in fact it is usually part of the Landlord Tenant Act that the Landlord must provide a fridge as it is a necessity for life (well for most of us). I can only assume in CA that people live without fridges???? Weirdness….It feels like we moving to an alien planet sometimes…hehe … May the Aliens be friendly and not use anal probes!!!

I am off to relax at work…lol….well sort of relax, at least not think about fridges, cats and anal probes

I slept most of the day. J took Becca out to the park then *gasp* he took her to McDonalds!! Now those of you that know me, you know that we have avoided fast food since last October. I was determined to not expose Becca to the fast food and all the marketing brain wash that goes along with the non-decomposing french fries. The fact that the food is so processed that the fries never decompose is repulsive. Anyway, I was shocked that J fell for the propaganda. No biggie it was bound to happen, I just hope Becca’s insides don’t rot (hehe).

I got some organizing and packing done this afternoon and then J and I looked at apartments online again. I am getting so excited!!! We found an awesome place, but they do not allow animal So I called my girlfriend in Alberta and I am hoping beyond hope that she will take Charisma. It makes me uber sad to give up another animal. But I have to take care of the humans in my family first. *sigh* So many sacrifices to chase dreams. Sometimes it is even harder that it is J’s dream and not really mine. Although I like to look at it that it is my dream that my husband is successful and has his dream job.

Off to work again tonight……OMG Big Brother is getting nasty eh? Love it!

YAY! It was Becca and Mommy day all day today (well except for that little nap that I took after dinner). J, the sweetest man alive, allowed me to sleep in this morning till :O 8 am! Then Becca played while I did some packing, organzing, throwing away. I have been doing some major purging in preparation for our big move! Only 29 sleeps until J’s defense. I am in shock that it is so close!!

After Becca got up from her morning nap, we cruised over to *shudders* Walmart. UGH i hate that store, everytime I am there, some issue comes up and it takes forever to get out of there. It sucks. Anyway, we picked up what we needed and got the heck out of there!

We had a great lunch, which Becca fed herslef with a spoon!! YAY! Although it was not the neatest experince it was awesome to watch her pick up the spoon and feed herself!

After we finished lunch, we cruised to the bank then it the outdoor swimming pool!! I had no idea that the outdoor pool had a wading pool!! w00t! Becca loved cruising around the pool, dunking under and watching the other kids swim! Before i knew it 3/4 of an hour went by! We walked home, tired and hungry. Becca ate her snack on the way home (partly to ensure she would not fall asleep in the stroller). She then crashed for an hour and a half, giving me the time to organize all the photos we have developed.

It appears Becca has gone to bed peacefully tonight!!! w00t! To top it off CBS is showing old Veronica Mars episodes!!! SO I am happily blogging and watching the coolest show on tv!! UGH! My bubble will burst when I have to go to work. I have to work 3 midnights shifts this weekend. Not that I can complain, Sunday is a holiday shift so I get time and half!!!

Have a great long weekend!!

I cruised into work early today because there was suppose to be a walk through our group home (that did not happen while I was there), also going in early menat that I could head over to our playdate earlier too!

Becca & I had a wonderful time at our playdate! It is so fun to watch all the babies (some not like babies at all anymore). Becca & I have been meeting with this group of women and their children since last October. It is one of the few things I will miss terribly once we live this city. SO many of the babies are walking now!! It is so exciting to watch what is in store for Becca in the coming months. Secretly, I hope since Becca is not walking yet, that she does not start until we get to California. Not that I will stop her development (like I could), but it would be better if she waited. All of us will be under less pressure and will have more time for one another. Plus, once they walk it seems like they get all crafty and destructive

J and I looked at apartments online again tonight! We are both getting really excited about going to CA!

Eeek! I need to get packing

So we were flipping through channels looking for MTV, (ugh could not find it) instead found a show on Discovery Health called Yummy Mummy. It is such a cool Mom show! Erica Ehm is an old VJ from Much Music (come on you oldie Canadians you know her). She totally talks candid about motherhood, sex toys and all that jazz! I love Discovery Health! When I was pregnant and on bed rest it was baby month and it was so fun to lie there and watch (well as fun as bed rest can be!)

UGH! I have a wicked headache….going to be cruising to bed soon!

It was one of those days that the camera just did not come out so I thought I would post a classic pic for you all!

It rained last night. A beautiful storm. Everytime it rains I think back to the night that Becca was born. It stormed that night & I gazed out my hospital window, deep with desire to be with my daughter. She felt so far away, sleeping in the NICU & I felt so alone & scared. Was she ok? Did she long for me like I longed for her? When will I be able to hold her in my arms, nurse her, kiss her….
They say that memories fade over time, but this memory of that night seems so strong still.

My mind was totally on babies as I drifted in and out of sleep last night. I had a crazy (and recurring) dream that I was giving birth to twins! My water broke and Becca was calling J on a cell phone. We rushed to the hospital, where I amazingly gave birth to twin boys (very quickly lol dreams are so great that way!). Becca remained in the room, because we had no where to take her. It was a wild dream. As exciting as twinds would be, I really hope that was not a glimpse into the future It is not the first time I dreamt of having twins. When I was pregnant with Becca, I dreamt constantly that I was having twins. My OB said that women rarely dream of their current pregnancy and that I was probably dreaming of my second pregnancy :O My dad was a twin (sadly, his twin died in infancy), so it totally runs in our family. Craziness

Becca & I walked J to work again this afternoon (thankfully no rain this time!). We cruised over to the park afterwards. Becca is totally not a fan of crawling in the great outdoors. When we sit her on the grass, she sticks her feet up in the air, so not to touch it! It is really cute to be honest! Anyhoo! I placed Becca on the sand at the park to see if she would crawl to the equipment. After much encouragement she did indeed crawl on the sand!! It was so cute to watch her. I have been reading about free play and the importance of allowing your toddler decide where and how she plays, so I wanted her to decide what she wanted to do at the park, rahter than me guiding her.

*sigh* Once again Becca was totally relaxed and sleepy when nursing tonight, then BAM! Wide awake and totally not going to sleep!!! grrr! She lies in our arms totally relaxed and content but refuses to allow herself to go to sleep. Nothing in her routine has changed…..Well except the fact that I have been disappearing 5 days a week to go to work or sleep once home from work. But she is totally cool about napping during the day. In fact she is improving, falling asleep almost instantly and not nursing during the day. *sigh* I spent an hour in her room trying to get her to sleep, then J tag teamed and took over. She finally fell asleep after he wrapped her up tight in a blanket and racked her to sleep. She was soaked with sweat but asleep. Changes are just going to get worse before it gets better. In four short weeks I am done work, and then one week later we cruise off on our trek across the US to California in a UHAUL!?!?! Poor kid, we are about to rock her world completely! Fun Fun Fun

hehe, we are suppose to have a staff meeting next week. I spoke to my boss, letting her know I could not attend because J had to work. Rather than saying that was cool, I am to bring Becca to our staff meeting. Really she can’t breach confidentiality soooooo….It should be interesting!

I off to read a few great blogs then hit the sack. I am heading into work early tomorrow so I can get off earlier, and therefore be able to take Becca to our weekly playdate!! weee!!!